Tuesday, 21 April 2009


Let’s just establish this now. I am a helicopter parent. I hover over my children. I do. I know I do. I can’t help it. When they were born they tried to get Himself to cut the umbilical cords with a pair of scissors but I rugby tackled him and stayed connected to my babies. The umbilical cord doesn’t stretch very far and I know eventually the girls are going to have to yank and chew it to get the hell away from me. I know that.

Having said that. Thing One came home today and mentioned in an off-hand manner that she was away this weekend.

Because this is how it works nowadays, don’t cha know? No nice handwritten (or even computer printed) invitations, with addresses and phone numbers. Oh no. At most she’ll get a text “ma bday satdy u cmng?.

The dilemma I have is... I have no idea who this girl is. Or where she lives. Or her surname. Or if her parents have have criminal records checks. Or anything in fact. I barely know her name. How can I stalk them to see if they are suitable people to look after my precious if I can’t google them???

However Posh is telling me to let her go. She is says she understands my reluctance, my trepidation, my paranoia, my outright stifling omg will you let those children go already… She says “at some point, you are going to have to say yes to something you don’t want her to do”. At which point I blocked her on MSN because come on already. I let her leave the house to go to school don’t I?

Thing One is telling me that Posh is young and cool, and remembers what it was like, whereas I am old and decrepit and want her to have no life. At which point I reminded her that she was asking a favour from me, and she threw her arms around my neck, crying that I was the best mum ever!! Sarky madam that she is.

So! Would you allow your children to go to a sleepover where you don’t know the family? Were you allowed to sleep at friends’ homes if your parents hadn’t interviewed met the friend?

My daughter’s social life is relying on you.

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