Wednesday, 31 December 2008

Peace at Last

My cold is still making itself heard. Mostly at night, according to Himself. He is comparing my peaceful nocturnal slumbers to the rasp of chainsaws and the felling of the rainforests.

I would just like to point out that I don't snore. Whatever he is trying to insinuate, he is wrong. I am simply exhaling deeply through my nostrils as I dream of all the annoyances the children and Himself have inflicted upon me that day.

Himself on the other hand... He has a cold too. And... well I did hear that blocking nostrils was a cure for snoring. So I rolled over and pinched his nose closed. All it did was change the pitch and tempo. Which, by the way, if you pinched at different places in the nose and with differing force, can actually play a tune. Like "Jingle Bells". Fun. Still snoring though. Well if blocking the nostrils is supposedly a cure, surely blocking the nostrils and mouth would work too?? HEY! Success! No more snoring! He's awake and all is silent (apart from the shouting "what the hell do you think you were doing??!), and now - even better - he's scared to go to sleep in case I suffocate him in his sleep.

Night night.

No comments: